Day 40: Try Something New

Try something today that you know you cannot do, something new to you.

I wasn’t sure what I wanted my new thing to be today, but the book gave me an idea.  It suggested to learn to say Sanskrit words.  I have a list with me today, and my books, which I will be reviewing here-and-there throughout the day.  As I read my yoga books, I often find that I skip over some of the Sanskrit words because they’re too hard to pronounce, or I feel silly because I know I am pronouncing them wrong.  I think I might also use Google… there are some websites out there that will play a blurb of someone saying the word to you so you can learn its sound.

I look forward to this challenge today, despite how simple it might seem.  I am a learner by nature.  If I don’t know something, I ask someone who does or I look it up on the Internet.  I crave knowledge.  It feels weird for me still to be done with school… it was such a huge part of my identity.  It still is, really.  We never really stop being students… our school just changes is all.  The universe and myself are my teachers now.

The reading today continued to talk about moderation, or brahmacarya.  Gates says that this concept is often linked to courage.  That it takes courage to walk away from the downward spiral that the chaos of imbalance can cause in our lives.  In contrast, Gates examines fear to be the root cause of imbalance.  We fear that we are not perfect, and so we strive in one area over others because we think that this achievement will make us perfect and happy.  When that doesn’t happen, our pendulum swings in the other direction… for another imbalance.

I have to agree with the concept of courage playing a huge role in regaining balance in our lives.  Often times to find balance, we must pull back from activities and people.  This is not always an easy thing to do.  We fear that we might lose our jobs if we loosen our grip on it even just a little, or that we’ll wind up divorced because we are spending a smidgen of extra time alone, or that we’ll hurt someone’s feelings.  A lot of times, we choose  to remain stuck in our own unhappiness to make someone else happy… for fear of what might happen if we do change.

Damn right it takes courage to take a step outside of your downward spiral.  But you know what?  It’s so worth it.  I may have lost a friend in this process, but I have gained so much.  I have gained more calm and balance in my life.  I have more energy to devote to others, including myself.  I am learning to love me again… hell, I am learning who I am again.  I got a little lost back there.  Yes, this is hard work.  But the hardest work yields the greatest bounty.  Take that brave first step… it gets easier from there.

I have not yet done my yoga practice for the day, but I have a yummy shoulder stretch lined up.  In fact, the flow is entitled “Daily Shoulder Vitamins.”  It’s sounds great, doesn’t it?  I can’t wait to get home today, get in some good tension release off my shoulders, and enjoy my Friday night.

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